The First Man: Father-Daughter Relationship

What does the father-daughter relationship influence?

Self-confidence:

Most girls are very sure of their mother's love. However, they often feel they have to fight for their father's attention. Therefore, by showing love and recognition you greatly strengthen your daughter's self-confidence. Various studies show that women with a strong relationship to their father are less likely to suffer from depression or eating disorders in adulthood.

Relationships:

'You marry your father.' What is often said with a wink actually has a real basis: because people feel most comfortable with what they know, adult women often choose their partner based on their father's characteristics—even if unconsciously. Or they seek constant attention and love in later relationships to make up for earlier deficits in love.

Thinking:

Men and women handle situations differently. Even though the generalization that women decide by feeling and men by reason does not always apply, a father's actions also influence his daughter. By observing him she learns that there are other ways to cope with a situation—not just the way mom always does.

Independence:

Fathers interact with their children differently than mothers. They are usually less anxious and trust their children more. This also affects girls' independence. Studies in the USA have found that women in leadership positions often had a particularly good relationship with their father.

When the daughter becomes a woman: father-daughter relationship during puberty

Sooner or later the sweet girl becomes a young woman. At the latest when her figure begins to develop female curves during puberty, every father realizes that his daughter is growing up. This changes something in the relationship and often brings distance and feelings of shame: cuddling is no longer as natural as before and you can no longer barge into the bathroom when your daughter is showering. Try to give her the necessary space.

Feelings of jealousy are also completely normal when your daughter brings her first boyfriend home. Instead of wagging your finger and introducing new rules, you should continue to show your daughter how much you appreciate and love her. If you notice that she always has a safe haven with her father and you support her, the relationship will remain strong through the difficult years until adulthood.

Father-daughter relationship in divorced families

In Germany, about one in five children grows up with only one parent due to separation or other circumstances—mostly with the mother. The male perspective is still important for the girl's development. Even if the relationship with the mother is over and possibly difficult, you should try to maintain and strengthen contact with your daughter. That way you can do a lot of good.

How can I strengthen the father-daughter relationship?

Allow your own feelings:

A father may bring a bit more rationality into the relationship. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't show feelings. On the contrary, it will benefit your daughter if she sees that a man can also show his emotions.

Make time:

Parental leave for fathers makes it possible: take time to build a strong relationship with your daughter. The genuine attention your daughter receives from you during this time has a strong influence on her development and will bring you closer together.

Cuddling:

Especially in the first years of life, physical contact is extremely important for bonding with your child. Dad doesn't always have to be there only to romp and joke around; he can also show his love through cuddling.

Spark interest:

Don't assume from the outset that your daughter won't be interested in how to play football or how to fix things. Activities that are not necessarily associated with "being a girl" are still fun for many. This way hobbies can develop that you both do together and that strengthen the relationship.

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