Our three first-aid tips:

• Trust your your gut feeling – this often works more reliably than you expect

• Pay attention to your child's needs – and less to what parenting guides recommend

• Face everyday life with a a healthy dose of calm – and a bit of pragmatism can't hurt either

We have also put together a few helpful pieces of information on what to expect in the first years with a baby and toddler.

Developmental phases – when does my child learn what?

The first years with a child fly by. From the tiny, helpless newborn, your baby quickly develops into a lively, attentive little person. The first smile, the first steps, the first word – many parents can hardly wait for these milestones. The pace of development varies from baby to baby, and the older your child gets, the longer the time spans for particular developmental steps become.

• The first smile: Between the 2nd and 3rd month of life, your baby begins to smile at you intentionally – a highlight that quickly makes many parents forget the restless first weeks.

• The first tooth: There are babies who are born with a little tooth in their mouth. As a rule, however, the first teeth come through from the 5th or 6th month of life. Don't worry if it takes longer: some babies don't get teeth until 10 months.

• Eye color: Light-skinned babies are usually born with bluish-looking eyes. At about 6 months the color begins to change and by 12 months at the latest children have their final eye color.

• Eating purees: Experts recommend starting the first puree between the 5th and 7th month. The timing of weaning depends on how long mom and baby want to breastfeed. Most stop by the end of the first year.

• Talking: The first multisyllabic sounds, from about the 7th month, already suspiciously resemble "Mama" or "Papa" – but most babies only speak deliberate words between the 9th and 14th month of life. By 18 months they already use at least 50 words and understand considerably more.

• Sitting independently: Between the 8th and 10th month babies learn to sit up independently and sit securely. Better not to set your baby in a sitting position before they can get into it on their own.

• Crawling: The first crawling attempts usually occur between the 6th and 10th month of life. Some skip crawling and shuffle or roll until they pull themselves up and take their first steps.

• Sleeping through the night: When children sleep through the night is not only a matter of development but depends on many different factors. Some babies at six months already sleep six or more hours in a row. But there are also children who still wake regularly at night at three or four years. According to a survey, about one third of babies sleep through by one year.

• Walking: At 9 or 10 months many babies begin to pull themselves up on objects and to move along them independently. It may still take some time until the first steps – but by the 18th month most babies have learned to walk.

• Potty training: Between one-and-a-half and two years, children develop a sense for their bladder function and begin to take an interest in the potty. When children can do without diapers varies greatly and cannot be accelerated even with lots of practice – some children are ready at three, others at four or five years.

What does my child need?

Time with a baby and toddler is wonderful, but sometimes it is also accompanied by uncertainty. Maybe the everyday life with a child is completely different than expected – and maybe your child reacts differently in certain situations than you "planned". Some children are open and curious, others more reserved and cautious, some constantly seek closeness to mom and dad, others prefer to occupy themselves alone or with other children. Some children tend to have tantrums, others cry quickly or become fearful.

Fundamental questions about how parents can best meet their child's needs often include:

• How much attention does my child need, what is too much of a good thing?

• How can I help my child overcome fears?

• How can I support and encourage their personality?

• How do I prepare my child for daycare, nursery, etc.?

• How much contact with friends does my child need, and when?

Even though it unsettles many parents at first to hear this: You know best what your child needs. This does not mean that you should insist on your competence as mother or father in every disputed question about children's nutrition and upbringing. Rather, it is the awareness that you know your child and their personality better than anyone else. Pay attention at every age to the signals, which your child gives you – and feel free to trust your gut instinct.

When will my baby finally sleep through the night?

The question that concerns all parents – and which simply cannot be answered definitively. Tips for falling asleep and sleeping through the night are plentiful – unfortunately no magic formula. Too many factors play a role in your baby's sleep behavior. We have a a few tips, on how you can support your baby's sleep. The most important advice remains: Have patience – and persevere.

Exceptions and setbacks:

Even if children have been sleeping through the night for a while, restless nights can occur again and again, even for an extended period. Their little teeth may ache, the day may have been too exciting, or there may be no obvious reason at all. In such cases, only waiting helps – perhaps there will be time during the day for a short nap to regain strength.

Nutrition:

"If your baby is really full in the evening, it will sleep through the night" – many tired parents have heard this sentence. In fact, it makes little sense to 'stuff' a child in the evening so that they sleep better. There are many different reasons why children wake at night, and too much or too rich food at night can even disrupt sleep.

Set bedtime rituals:

Reading a book or singing a song before bedtime, cuddling together, a night light or a music box that runs for a while signal that the day is coming to an end and help your child to settle.

Sleep environment:

A temperature around 18° C is ideal. If everyone feels comfortable with it, the baby may also sleep in the parents' bed.

Regular daily routine:

Even if it's not particularly exciting – a regular daily routine with set times for meals, naps or walks gives your child security and makes it easier for them to prepare for the night.

Important for all parents: Don't forget yourself

Especially in the early stages, your own needs fall completely into the background. But the demanding everyday life with a baby and toddler is much easier to cope with if you occasionally make sure of a mini break is provided. Sometimes just a few hours alone or with friends are enough to recharge – and of course couples also need time together now and then. Even if you have to plan far in advance and organize babysitting – treat yourselves occasionally to a short break from parenting.

Checklist for everyday life with babies and toddlers

• Aim for a regular daily routine – and expect that it will be disrupted

• Calmness in everyday life: Perfectionism has no place with a baby and toddler – let things slide sometimes

• Be creative: What works is good – if your baby only falls asleep in the car or can only be soothed by the sound of a hairdryer, then do so

• Don't compare: Neither compare your baby with a friend's, nor siblings with each other – every child has their own pace

• Ritualize daily routines – from diaper changes to meals to bedtime

• Plan small time-outs: Difficult and sometimes impossible – but each time a breath of fresh air for family life

• Have a lot of patience – and enjoy life with a baby and toddler

Image credits

Family photo with baby and toddler © Halfpoint - stock.adobe.com